Filed by KOSU News in Art & Life.
August 30, 2011

All these newfangled sandwiches we eat make us nostalgic for the good ol’ days, when foods were healthy and people cared about what they put in their bodies. So we pulled out our old 1965 Betty Crocker Boys and Girls cookbook…only to find the seeds of the obesity epidemic were sown far earlier than we suspected. Witness: The Frank Round-up.

Eva: Well, now I’ve seen everything. Except hamburgers on hot dog buns.

Peter: It’s amazing the hot dogs hold their shape.

Mike: Well, that’s why we’re using Memory Weiners.

Ian: This is a feat of sandwich engineering, probably pioneered by somebody who picked up the wrong kind of buns.

Robert: Trying to force it into a ring really goes against its nature, though. It’s like the Mercator projection of encased meats.

Eva: I wonder if this is what you buy at baseball games in Canada.

Mike: Robert’s looks more appetizing. He’s the better sandwich mohel.

Ian: It really is like Danny Devito and Arnold Schwarzenegger in Twins there. Except even the good one is kind of like Danny Devito.

Eva: It’s pretty, if you think of it as art, not as food.

Ian: It’s like we’ve gone back in time to sample their foods. Don’t disturb the fat-time continuum or the KFC Famous Bowl may never be born!

Peter: This cookbook’s from 1965? That’s the year I was born.

Ian: Would you say you’ve accomplished more than this sandwich in your 46 years?

Mike: This sandwich is actually hosting Talk of the Nation tomorrow.

[The verdict: not bad. A great way to convince your kids to eat vegetables, assuming you could first convince yourself that atomic green pickle relish was a vegetable.] [Copyright 2011 National Public Radio]